The Day

…and there it was

The day of the dead, pretty bold & pretty blue

And all they thought was thoughts of you

Your tussled hair, your broken speech

Your broken heart, when you would attempt to speak

Wandering in the broken blue, the memories we flooded forth

Of you, of you.

We gathered close to feel each tear, this one huddled to the other near

We let trickle to the long long fall, the whisper of the moments each recall

So wave now, that solemn farewell,

God knows this is the only hell

To live here, without the breath of you

Against my chest. An eternity it feels, without you.


How Loss…

How loss

Strikes at the bones.

How loss

Breaks wide with a wetness, heart bleeding to lung

How loss

Scatters the mind & fuses to the spine

How loss

Comes tiptoeing up beside the bed each night

How loss

Echoes through the waves of blinding snow

How loss

Becomes everything except, a home

How loss

Eats away at the little veins that run up our necks

How loss

Rips them from us

How loss

Grates away the nerves & the sinews

How loss

Is a full grave, both in our chest & in the ground

How loss

It comes back around

How loss

Makes us weep. Makes us drown.

What Cold Days But Warm Hearts Look Like…

So, it’s a rare thing that most of our Service group gets a picture together, but here we are. My oldest is the only publisher missing I believe.

Sunday service is always really good. Most of us have at very least doorstep Bible studies. My best progressive call is with a woman about my age, military family & so sweet. Four kids, all nearly grown and when I was done our little study this week, I offered her the Watchtower on the greatest gift & asked her what gift she was most thankful for. Her reply was sincere— that her whole family would be home for Christmas, her eldest is in basic training in Ontario. I can only imagine the trepidation she feels knowing he will be serving in the military soon.

Our hall now has Hindi North associating with our congregation, which actually address four Indian languages, & Arabic is with one of the other congregations in the hall.

I have found, most people in our territory have become far more receptive to wanting to know what the Bible teaches recently. Everyone seems to have found this. People seem to enjoy hearing good news & having their questions about world conditions & what the Bible gives as a hope for the future answered. Despite the cold yesterday, we had great conversations with all the people we got home. Everyone. How great is that?!

The spiritual food being provided in huge amounts—that is proof of God’s true organization at work on earth. Combine it with the unity & love of our brotherhood regardless of racial, national or lingual background—I am so thankful to be a part of this global preaching work alongside the brothers & sisters.


and so that intense quiet of snow upon snow has consumed

both light & sound, already, the world in all its greenery

has become some fictitious memory boasted about by strange bullies & beasts

I am washed down, with this tin taste of blood in my lungs, the cold only biting with small teeth

how often have I run, lungs bursting, drowning, here in the cold

what wild consumptions of ice & black & how peculiar this sky, singing strange horrors in the night

all things are whimpering at the door, humming, or howling…or screaming

slowly light attempted its feeble rise, only to fall, in breaths of blood & flicker

Ask me what I know? How does the North keep me alive inside it’s deathly embrace?

How much blood has it frozen, blued, crusted in the veins of my fingers & toes & most definitely my heart?

How lovely is the frozen face & the water eyes of winter as they realize…

I once heard, rumours of soft sand & high held sun & ocean waves & leaves that never fall; of trees that do not stand, thin stark & white, glimmering rig immortally in the night

But here, this sway of stiff limbs & creaking bows & strange songs slithering along the snow, this, this is all I know. It is hum-drumming through these frozen wastelands—where my body barely breathes, only puffs, clouds of haze & glow.


how smoothly the sun 


horizon to horizon

a thin blade of light

gasping for breath

between this rib, & that…
shadows darkly splayed

how quietly this wreck flies

end over end, the wind whipping, everything pulsed open

the sinew of this world is tough to chew 

the marrow is molded & this is to be the putrid feast
Let’s tear it down, open, apart–something. Anything. 

              I’m quiet. Sitting. Watching sunset–upon sunset upon sunset. The cloud in this symphonic lullaby of beauty, heaven screaming at me. 

     The silent rise of the sun, pouring out in this river of mandarin & ice–I am, quiet. 

How many silent moving pictures, all at once, motioning with sudden parallels of ascending & descending–that little strange moment of crossing, just to find silence 

the bird pondering release–the cage crack glistening, slightly–to squeeze out–to tear off its own wings–to be push itself free–it sits, unbloodied, within, waiting, patiently

A Jehovah’s Witness, a Muslim & a Catholic walk into…

A Jehovah’s Witness, a Muslim & a Catholic walk into a dental office. This is a true story. 

I am the Witness. The dental assistant was the Catholic, & the dentist is the Muslim, and it’s Halloween. 

Being at the dentist on Halloween of course brings up the topic of candy & celebration. 

“Nope. We don’t celebrate Halloween.”

“What?! No demonic celebrations for you?” laughs the dentist. 

“Nope. We are Jehovah’s Witnesses. So, we kind of abstain from satanic celebrations.”

I know Muslims. They ‘don’t celebrate Halloween’ but they also don’t not celebrate Halloween. It all depends on how Muslim they are. 

The Catholic, European in origin, with a thick Polish accent, as well, does not celebrate ‘Halloween’ but does certainly celebrate All Soul’s Day on November 1st. 

Well, as the conversation continues, they are surprised to both learn that Jehovah’s Witnesses do not believe in an after life. At least not one that is similar to their beliefs. 

It was a nice little conversation between people of three different faiths & in the end, I felt it had made a small dent in the misunderstandings & lies of Christendom & that someone Muslim could see Witnesses refuse to water satanic teachings into Biblical ones. 

What Is The Condition of the Dead? The Bible is clear & concise on what happpens at Death & what hope lies ahead for those who have died. Yet another beautiful video for teaching those who are humble, honest & hungry for spiritual food. 

“Men will be…fierce…”

Many things during these last days weigh us all down. There are the things we resign ourselves to–natural disasters, illness, things that feel we can have no effect on their existence & the toll they demand. 

But the shootings–they’re a true devastation of a different sort. They are slowly eroding belief in the goodness of fellow man. There is a coldness in their wake. That one individual can create so much heartbreak, so much terror. 

I think that people handle these news reports in one of two ways. They either ostrich or they glare at it as they would an eclipse, dangerously agonizing over it. There feels to me there is no in between. You must either feel it, or you must numb yourself, no doubt for self preservation, and move onward. 

Most people in the wake of terror, get up & plod on. Their day does not change. They sleep, they rise, they work, they eat–rinse, repeat. This is a coping mechanism. One we all must mask ourselves with. 

Hearing yet again, the political rhetoric, the story (& for some of us, the agonizing emotional envisioning of the final moments of mothers & children, their horror inside terror) of life shot out & bled from people who did not deserve it, the conspiracy theories & the grief, the scramble to explain the whys–it’s all a heavy toll on the heart. 

To rise & greet the sunlight & snow, so far away & yet feel anything can happen anywhere at any moment that could violently end your world, it’s heavy. 

Today’s day’s text was as always well timed: 

“Throw all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.”

–1 Peter 5:7

I can see how so many would buck belief in God in a world filled with so much hate & violence. But God doesn’t rule the world. He doesn’t steal us up to heaven because he needed another angel. That song “He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands” comes to mind & it makes me gag. I can’t imagine being raised with this satanic notion that God rules the world in its current state & how angry I would be with Him. I would reasonably draw the conclusion that the god of this world is cruel & unfeeling. What a cunning tactic the god of this world is using. 

“We know that we originate with God, but the whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one.”

–1 John 5:19

2 Timothy 3:1-5 describes the people of the last days as being ungodly, selfish, fierce.  Sadly but expectedly this is true. Anyone who can murder the innocent is truly fierce, lacking natural affection for others. 

My heart is so so sad at the news of another mass shooting. This world is truly filled with darkness. May Jehovah give the humble & meek, hope & light. I adore this song linked below. The orchestral is moving enough on its own but add the choral & it feels like warm spring sunshine after the long winter dark, refreshing, soaking down to the division of spirit & soul.

Light In A Darkened World